Civilization at its best and at its worst, reflected at the turn of the decade!

Past goes the 2009 and in comes 2010.





For some strange reason I did not know, I initiated a new year count down plan with my buddies: dinner then fireworks from 101.



My last experience of counting down was celebrating the coming of 2006. I was 21 back then. And I was eager for the crowd.


I am turning 26 in January.


And this time, I am not eager for the crowd either.

The fireworks itself is a show of modern technology (although artistically speaking I find this year's work only okay).

What I hate about is the trash that was left behind on the street.

The streets were closed by the cops by around 10. And people start walking on the street that used to be driven by cars. So people were excited. It felt a bit like a big party we used to have in Queen's during homcoming weekend.

Streets were clean.

Yet, by the end of the counting down, when the year already turned to be 2010, things were different.

The streets were not only filled with people, but also trashes and spilled drinks. I saw some guy doing his bit to impress his girl at the entrance of one MRT entrance, where a circle was formed by bistanders, all the same time when people were trying to get home, which further congests teh traffic.

So...Is Taipei still a modern place?

Where so many selfish acts surface in one single event on just one night.

When we Taiwanese people were proud of our progress in the last few years, about clean cities or "technology" island, our citizenship education, along with our average salary, stagnated at the same level. I know selfish behavior can be seen everywhere in the world, but to which extend such selfishness is been seen as norm, I believe, there is a problem. And this problem, is in our collective soul.

So, how ironic to see this so called World's tallest building with "Taiwan Up" on it surrounded by streets filled with trash?

I understand The essence of Miss now...

They say....something is missing.
It means, something is lost.
Something that used to be there, is not anymore.
Hence, something is missing.

When they say, I am missing you.
It means, you are always here, but not now, not anymore.
Someone who has always been there, is gone.
And part of you, is lost, like the thing that used to be there, but not anymore.

I miss you....have been for a long time...

台灣惱人的利益結構

講到油價
我們動不動就聽到凍漲
立法委員和政府官員應該是能夠做正確決定的人
他們，卻因為選情和民情的壓力，
每每喊出凍漲的口號

台灣
是石油輸入國
買進原油的價格
跟世界其他各國買的原油是同一個價錢
在世界原油近幾年已經翻了好幾翻的時間內
台灣翻了幾翻?

所以
國營的中油虧錢 (暫不說他們這些虧錢還一天到晚拿紅利跟要求加薪的無恥行為)
國庫的錢要拿去補這個洞
政府越來越沒錢發展重要建設 (這些重大建設的預算裡有多少要被ㄎㄧㄤ?)
嚴格說來，更是要用油量少的納稅人，去補貼用油量大的人用油!!
(每天坐公車的阿民{不用加油}要補貼每天坐Benz500的阿諒{天天要加油}油錢)

那麼
是官員不做事呢?
還是民意不讓政府對於世局的改變做出應變呢?
還是台灣的民主政治結構促使政府空轉呢?
還是台灣的民眾，不願面對世界的改變呢?
到底是哪一個?

當有人跳出來反對油價漲，
沒有人出來支持嗎?
民眾的社會正義感在哪
還是已經得了"社會冷漠症"?


我們做為台灣公民
是否也該反省....

戒急用忍-雍正皇帝

周六跟爸媽去故宮，參觀雍正皇帝文物展。幾個月沒來故宮，感覺人變得很多。不時看到金髮碧眼的老外，頭髮梳得很帥的ABC，以及現在台灣景點必見的---陸客團。



故宮變得跟我以前去的感覺不太一樣了，變得比較有朝氣。不知道是人潮的關係，還是因為真的有用心經營。居然連衣服都讓我忍不住破費。



今天來故宮的人潮有一大部分是來看雍正展的。展示廳裡燈光昏暗且處處是人，但是仍然不減我這"雅士"的興致。但是眾多文物展示中，令我印象最深，也最有感觸的，莫過於在康熙仍在位時，在雍正寫給父親的信上，康熙所朱批的"戒急用忍"四字。



住在台灣，經歷過李登輝時代的人應該都知道這四個字。他把它用在西進政策上，叫民間對於往西向大陸發展，不要急，要忍。在當時實在是響噹噹的口號。也曾經有好的口碑，但曾幾何時，因為台灣意識形態的發展，也多少斷送了許多台商在"世界工廠"蓬勃發產時搶下市場的好時機。



當年康熙送給雍正這四字的原意是要他，能夠收斂自己個性中較魯莽而性急的一面。有一說是當年康熙其實看中他個性中耿直的一面，卻也擔心他不夠鎮定，在複雜的宮廷生活及未來處是治國時造成困擾。

很多事情不是當下就必須做決定。緩一緩對可於很多事情的進行其實都很有幫助，因為世界上很多事件都有其成因，其中包含了客觀與非客觀因素。一時因為表面或剛浮出檯面的現象或成因做出決斷往往有失公允，欠缺周全。舉例來說，前幾天在報紙上看到小學老師體罰貧困學童，因為他繳不出學雜費等等。當下讀者的正常反應，應該是強烈譴責這個劣質教師。問題是，這個報導是否有包含到老師觀點。說不定，他根本不知道學童家境清寒。或者說，學童在未交錢之於口出惡言，所以遭到體罰。所以，我們在譴責老師之前，是否有想過如此離譜的是會產生，是否只是一些對彼此的不了解呢?報導中並沒有提及老師對於學生家庭狀況是否知情，也未提起老師是否受到學校催繳的壓力。很多事情，在做決定之前，可能要更深入探討思索端倪，這其實才是康熙送給雍正戒急用忍四字的真正內涵。

我的個性雖然很理性，可是卻很急，有點不甘寂寞和定不下來的成分。在處理人際關係、感情和自身的許多事物上，也常常做了讓自己痛苦和後悔的決定(這其中不乏有一些是因為我的觀念的偏差或是自私)造成的決定。可是我想說的，是"戒急用忍"實在是我今後處事的一個努力的方向，修身養性，把自己當成"皇帝"來修為....嘿嘿嘿...

impatience

Fucking note to self.....


More Patience is needed for things to work out!

你怎麼看的完...大江大海

你怎麼能看完大江大海

看完一篇
怎麼有勇氣繼續往下讀

怎麼能看
眼睛卻不模糊

怎麼能想像
親人以前
過過這種日子

怎麼忍心
看呢??

This is IT...I watched twice!!! In the Theater!!

Those of you who know me really well know I am as "thrifty" as one can be. So knowing that P.Diddy had gone to the same movie TWICE in the theater would probably triggered those people to ask back the money they lend me or spent on me.... but yeh...for the LOVE of MJ, I, Patrick "handome" Lai, DID it.

And it was as worthwhile as ever.

I went to the movie with my mom the first time, and I didn't shed a tear. The movie was a run down of the concert. Each song comes out in the order of the concert would show. Only that each song has different elements so they present each song in different way. What caught my eye the first time i saw it was the make-up for Smooth Criminal. I was truly intrigued by the remake of the opening movie, by putting MJ in a black and white movie with those old movie stars. I was disappointed to have not seen the 45 degree lean, but all the music and the dance was awesome.

MJ's voice in this movie was fabulous....When he sang in rehearsal or when trying to get in tune with the music crew....it sounded like his voice is just another instrument. I guess 10 yrs of rest really did good to his vocal cord. It probably sounded better than it was in most of his albums. Silky smooth and mellow. There is a layer of resonance in his voice too. Gosh. I got goosebumps just describing it.

The first time i saw it, i wasn't impressed by how MJ danced. I probably saw too many of his old clips...so I thought he was getting a bit slow. But the second time i saw it....i saw the groove in the moves. I saw the artist in him. The creator in him. He was always thinking what move to do and trying to get a "feel" to combine his songs and his moves. I was fascinated.

But what is more emotional to me is the last scene, when the carema shot him from the side, and when he was simulating end of the song by spreading his arms, heads up and chest pumped out. Then caption comes out with "Michael Jackson, King of Pop". I realized, then, "Oh gosh, he is REALLY dead." And my eyes just welled up. I didn't cry (macho!!!), but it truly was a sad loss. He was a genius, a kid, or as he always imagined, a Peter Pan, to make impossible dreams possible, through his shows and his songs......I will miss you, MJ.

好空

最近突然發現自己好空
沒有什麼東西
也沒什麼想法
是前一波太多想法了嗎?
是我太專注在人生的一個領域嗎?
是我已經找不到我的熱情在哪裡了嗎?
what happened to me?
Nicco說的沒錯!
Vicky說的沒錯!
I need a goal in life, and that goal should not be a girl....

L-O-V-E quoting Michael Jackson!

Learning to let go...

I still miss you.
I cannot take a look of out without wanting you back.
But i have to let you go.
I have to let myself go.
I have to let our past go.

I learnt wut giving is, and I learnt wut a relationship should be, and now it is time.



Hello HOT Chick!!





Patty the beefy boy

New Balance Men's BB905 Basketball Shoe

Few months ago a friend came back to Taiwan and brought me a pair of NB bball shoes, and I gotta say, NB really got its techniques in shoemaking down to an artistic level. Its marketing technique, needless to say, is much less artistic. And this benefits me greatly coz i got to buy this pair for only $44.99 (~1500NTD).

The shoes I bought was BB905 red and white. With a velcro strap on top of the feet. New balance shoes not only come in different sizes in length but also in width. It has tight and good cushioning (I realized that in recent years nike shoes tend to have more rough or insufficient cushioning). The shoe does not seem to have a top high enough, yet surprisingly it is mid-to-high top and protects the ankle quite well.

The bottom of the shoes contains column like structures, kind of like the ones Reeboks carry. I gotta admit that I am quite shocked at how shock absorbing those babies are.

So overall, a great pair of shoes that went under the radar and was NOT sold in TAIWAN....What a load of pity!

GRADES:

Appearance: 4/5
Cushioning: 4.5/5
Stability: 4/5
Shock Absorbance: 4.2/5
Ankle Protection: 4.5/5

This is IT?

if only he would stop changing his face at that point....


Michael Jackson's last shots on stage are gonna be displayed in the theater in less than a month in Taiwan. For reasons I cannot resist myself to follow the frenzy and buy the tickets in advance. Afterall, I was a loyal follower of his until "Blood on the dance floor". However, within the first mere half a minute after online box office opened, the tickets were sold out. I was left empty handed online at 10:00:45.

Let's rewind a bit, before June 25th, his death, he was referred to as Wacko Jacko for more than 5 yrs. He won a case few years back against child molestation cahrges and I highly doubt the Taiwanese media even reported about the case. I suppose what the Taiwanese people knew about him in those last few years of his life were the incidences where his nose fell and speculations of his pedophilic rumors...

This is what I hate about human nature. Once he is dead, he is, all of a sudden, king of pop again. Fans or non fans swarmed back. People started to say good things about him. All those past "flaws" were erased by his own death. "He was a great father, the kindest person I have ever known"..blahblahblah. If he was such a nice friend and such a good human being, how come none of you, those so called "relatives and friends" never reached out for him when his life was in the downward spiral. It must have been super hard to deal with a superstar of his magnitude (hell, it is hard enough to get along with a normal folk like me already), yet it is no excuse. It was quite obvious that not many people who could give a damn give a damn about him in his final years.

So, once he is dead, every thing about him got sugar-coated. I was watching his clips on youtube the day before his death, therefore u can imagine how shocked I was when I hear the news. However, I was also annoyed by the huge influx of rumors about his death. I could not help to examine all the clips there are on the internet and look at his life to see what it means to be a truly outstanding star. Looking at his life in a greater scale changed all those envy for his talent to sympathy in my heart.

Imagine, being so talented as a child, you have to showcase your talent day in and day out, without any chance of making friends with normal people. That is, without any touch with the outside world. And being a public figure starting from such a young age, there is no way for him to get to know the outside world without getting a skewed image of the world. Only people who sees him as a god, or those who want to use him, would get close to him. He probably never had any people connecting with him as two human being for the sole purpose of making friends. How sad, would that be a life, for any of us. Hence all the weird behavior that follows (all the plastic surgeries for example). Buried under that great musical and choreographic talent is a self-esteem that is scarred and shattered since childhood. As people rising so high at such a young age, emptiness is a common feeling in them. So imagine how an unsatisfying life he has had, and how could he have not turned out the way he was without people helping him out.

This is IT, is the first ripping off of him after his death, would definitely not be his last. Just like Princess Di's death, which many shameless man, with no respect of the dead, revealed their, again, self-claimed romance with her. And this is human nature. Again, I feel effing sick of it. Sick of all the people taking advantage other's life, and sick of people only take others seriously and respectfully once they are dead.

Can't we just care about others more??

PEACE!!

THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME UNCOMFORTABLE, WEDDING!

So...can u recognize asianlabboy?? hint: i wear a number


Went to a wedding with my mom on Sunday.

The bride was a neighbor, about two years older than me, name is Sherry.
Mom is very close friends with the bride's mother, and I used to be close friends with her younger daughter, Cherry, who is my age and not yet married. They moved to the southern Taiwan when I was in grade 3, so it has been more than 15yrs since we last saw each other.

In Chinese wedding, the bride's side sit separately with the groom's side. And I sit with a bunch of people my mother's age who I don't know. With my best friend from childhood sitting beside me.

And once I sat down, the very first question that confronted me was " so Patrick, you have a girlfriend?" second is "How come you are so good looking yet still single?", and then the third sentence that comes out their mouth is " Oh, Cherry is really pretty now. Have you seen her today yet?" By the time I haven't. I haven't seen her for more than 15 yrs. I did heard from my mom that she is very cute nowadays. However, I knew she is in a relationship. Dring the wedding dinner, everyone kept coming up (old people, eh?) and asking me the same questions. Even Cherry's father came and asked whether I have a girlfriend and all that crap. And then he was like...." I will get Cherry here! You just wait!"

So....Parents at weddings are pimping their daughters? Chinese parents are sooo nice!

Now, put ur feet in my shoes (is that the right expression?) A man who came to a wedding to see some girl who he hasn't seen for more than 15 years and was thinking about getting this girl who already got a boyfriend at her sister's wedding! Oh and by the way, when Cherry saw me, she couldn't even recognize me??( I have to admit that I have become quite attractive compare to when I was 8. What can I say? Good Genes!!)

What pisses me off the most was that when Cherry got here, chit-chatted with me for a little bit, then left, somebody sneezed out " what a pity, Patrick, you were too slow and too late to snatch that girl up..."

As if I would have gone after her (She IS quite cute). And as if it was really a huge loss for me, but not for her.

Anyways....the general consensus at these kinds of events is that the one to be sympathized are the single ones, even at the mere age of 25....regardless of their success and look (I have to admit that I have achieved nothing significant in my life so far tho).

And the next day, the Cherry's mother called my mom,

"Patrick is SO handsome now!!" is what she said, according to my mom.

I know that is true, but putting me in that awkward position still was unacceptable.

MOMS...gosh!!(To Cherry's mom's credit, she did treat me well before they moved and was really elegant at the wedding),

But, all in all, a good wedding. Saw some cleavage from the bride, although I am not quite sure if it is morally acceptable. But considering how awkward a position the wedding put me into, I have to say "Oh yay~~~~~~!"

ANG LEE for LungYingTai Cultural Foundation in Taipei

Hi there,

For those of you who are in Taipei or live in Taiwan, there is one great event coming up!

I volunteer at this non-for-profit foundation called LungYingTai cultural foundation. Our goal is to educate the mass about all the different problems the whole global community or the Taiwanese people are facing. We are also dedicated to helping educate the new generation Taiwanese with a wider global view and critical thinking ability whilst keeping them in touch with their heritage.

Our seminars includes Taipei Salon, which usually talks about smaller scale culture issues or global affairs with speakers from within Taiwan (ex. Crisis in Darfur by Ambassador Lu Yi Zhen). We also have International Master's series in which big names are invited (such as Ang Lee like this time and Jane Floyd in April). We also have Taiwan series and China series in which past histories are explored and amended with but also future challenges are examined and discussed.

AND....ON OCTOBER 8th 2009, In TAIPEI

Director ANG LEE will be having a seminar alongside moderator Lung Ying Tai at China Gas Building (Kuo-Kuang Conference Hall (No.3, Songren Rd., Sinyi District, Taipei) ) at 7pm.

Topic -《Growing Up, Growing Old, Growing Young A Dialogue between Ang Lee and Lung Yingtai.

Those of you who are interested in joining us should visit website:

http://www.civictaipei.org/activity/meat/170.html

and register online

I will see you there!!

李安將在十月八號在中油國光大樓與作家龍應台對談

<<這一路走來的我—從臺南的泥土談起>>

全場免費


http://www.civictaipei.org/activity/meat/170.html

First Ever Blog Spot article

Hey there,

My name is Patrick. I currently work in Taipei, Taiwan at a boring biochemical company in which I stare into the boxes of excel files 8-5 and go home loathing myself for not being able to take good care of those lil boxes. Life is hard eh!?? Especially when you are doing job where u don make enuf money and the job does not fulfill your ability.

Hence the coming of this blog spot. It's quite hard to describe myself. Here is a starter. I grew up in Taipei up until 17. Then I went off to the north land-Canada. Stayed there through last year of high school and 5 years of college+internship. In the end felt pretty disappointed with the subject I studied therefore decided to come back to Taiwan and free flow, whilst finishing my military obligation as a Taiwanese citizen, all the while still feeling like a Canadian, weirdly. Unfortunately, the timing of my discharge from military was just two months after the Lehman Brother explosion. Therefore my salary was 30% lower than what I expected to take and was even lower than my salary when I was an intern.

I am very interested in international affair, at which i find most Taiwanese people don't spare to much attention. I am also interested in investing, especially stock markets and funds. I find making money through reading information and making decisions based on good logic and discipline is enjoyable and very satisfying. There is one problem: my pocket is not deep enough!

I also care about equality and fairness in the society, therefore I find Taiwanese politics and public system extraordinarily ridiculous and lack sense of logic.

I also love to learn new information, I love to read and think critically. Therefore this blog will not only be filled with my fun stories but also tons of mindful (or mindless) babbling!

PS: a picture for your enjoyment. I am the dark guy who smiled innocently (dumbfoundedly) like a jackass who doesn't know that in about a month not only would his girlfriend break up with him but also his left ankle would sprain a point where the tendons were permanently damaged~~~

some of my other engagements online...
http://www.perfspot.com/18131884
http://class.ruten.com.tw/user/index00.php?s=tap84343
http://www.wretch.cc/user/asianlabboy

make friends with me and share some thoughts!